Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny http://tfl.nu/4cwi
  Replies (12) Good night (3109) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook? http://tfl.nu/pdxj
  Replies (25) Good night (1153) Bad night (3688)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources. http://tfl.nu/m7l9
  Replies (28) Good night (3917) Bad night (1533)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by" http://tfl.nu/6dm5
  Replies (12) Good night (1168) Bad night (2584)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): 2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take. http://tfl.nu/jq3u
  Replies (20) Good night (2846) Bad night (1561)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing. http://tfl.nu/bjii
  Replies (24) Good night (1071) Bad night (2637)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn. http://tfl.nu/iixt
  Replies (13) Good night (3023) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out" http://tfl.nu/q7ym
  Replies (9) Good night (1320) Bad night (918)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit. http://tfl.nu/1gr7
  Replies (8) Good night (479) Bad night (1240)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest http://tfl.nu/d882
  Replies (5) Good night (1208) Bad night (452)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here. http://tfl.nu/vhqg
  Replies (1) Good night (689) Bad night (344)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me. http://tfl.nu/y6sy
  Replies (1) Good night (993) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused http://tfl.nu/qxtz
  Replies (3) Good night (394) Bad night (252)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies. http://tfl.nu/m7wt
  Replies (1) Good night (210) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (912): I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single. http://tfl.nu/n6zn
  Replies (0) Good night (161) Bad night (275)

Randomize