am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
