Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
