Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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