did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize