The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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