i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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