I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.