Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Come share oat with me in your robe
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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