love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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