Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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