You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
