can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
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she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
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We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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