Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
We left the knife in your bed.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.