Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize