I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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