Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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