Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
