dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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