did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
