How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
