I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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