You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
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