the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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