genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
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