your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
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