you would pick up someone in the library
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
