Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
