you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
