I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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