Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
we made out on top of his cat.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
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