He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
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