i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
