as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Text me some of your sweat
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize