On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
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