Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Randomize
