I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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