you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
third nipple confirmed
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
