im holly from the hills drunk
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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