I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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