Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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