mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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