How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
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