He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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