I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Buhtt sex?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Randomize
