I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
My feet surprised me
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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