I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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