I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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