Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize