why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize